Hi Everyone!
I know that I'm really late to this blog hop, but I figure better late than never. Actually, I wanted to hear Katherine Deane's thoughts on this topic and she suggested that I write my thoughts as well. So, I figured I couldn't ask someone else to do this and not do it myself. So, here we are.
Anyway, the topic for the round table today is anal punishment/play. The questions and my answers are below. Enjoy!
1.) Does anal punishment/play in a spanking romance get you all hot and bothered or is it a definite scene skipper for you?
It depends how the scene is done. I do like reading anal play scenes because I think that it is the best way for a submissive to be stripped of her control. I love that closeness that the two characters share and the complete trust that submissive has to have to let her Dominant take control of her like that. That gets me all hot and bothered.
If an anal punishment/play scene is done and it's all about the dominant proving his dominance over the submissive or if it's non-consensual then I generally skip it. To me, those aren't the reasons to have anal sex. But, each to his own.
2.) What elements do you like?
Again, I like the closeness that readers can almost feel between the two characters. Physically, I love reading about a Dominant preparing his submissive. Normally, the submissive fights her feelings towards this and I love reading about the Dominant getting her past her fears about anal play and teaches her to accept it and admit what she likes.
3.) What elements are turn offs to you?
If something and it doesn't matter if it's anal punishment/play or something else, I hate non-consensual acts. Personally, there is nothing that turns me on about one person saying "No!" and the other person enforcing what they want on the person objecting. That's wrong. Again, that's just me, some people may like that.
I'm also not a fan of Dominants who just use anal play/punishment to establish their dominance over the submissive. The submissive is letting you perform this act, the dominance is already established. There is no need to do this action just for the sake of saying, "That's right. I'm the dominant one here."
4.) Do you personally add this element to your stories?
I do add anal play in to my story. I do it because I think that it's the ultimate way for my characters to show that they trust one another. For example, from my first book published, Little Samantha's Choice, Jackson and Samantha had to go through many obstacles to get to the point where they really trusted one another after Samantha makes her discovery. For me, writing that those two had anal sex, it's my way of showing that Samantha submits to Jackson and trusts him fully to not hurt her and to take care of her.
Also, as most of you know, who have read my writing, I'm a very sweet writer. I love writing about the preparation that the Dominant takes to get his submissive ready for the act. Then having the Dominant talk to the submissive about overcoming her fears and then performing the act itself. Then having the Dominant take special care of the submissive afterwards. To me, anal play is one of the best ways to show readers that two characters fully trust and love one another.
Make sure to go hop along and check out what other authors have posted...you'll never know what you'll find! Happy Weekend! :-)
Well you may have joined late, but it was still intriguing to read your thoughts. I know within your first answer I was scratching my head, although from a "trying put myself in your shoes" sort of way. To think of anal as stripping a submissive of her control perplexes me, but then I'm at 21 years of BDSM experience, 14-ish years of it in one Man's collar.
ReplyDeleteFor me, I'm viewing my characters as never having done anal play before. So, the first few times when they aren't use to it they're viewing it as giving up all of their control because it's a new thing and they're fully trusting the Dominants to take care of them.
DeleteMeredith, I'm with you on using anal as a punishment or simply as a means to assert dominance. I read non-con, but I can't say it's my favorite. I also don't like it when the heroine is penetrated anally without any preparation or lube. I read a fisting scene recently and I'd have to say that is not something I would ever want to do, or allow anyone to do to me. In this case it was the heroine doing the fisting to a male who was playing the submissive role to her Domme as a show of trust, and she had small hands, even so I was wincing throughout the entire scene. I enjoyed the book and the series, but I would never want to play that way, ever.
ReplyDeleteOuch! Yes in my books, if anal play is going to happen there is going to be a lot of preparation.
DeleteGlad you joined up! I love non-con, but I think it's all about how it's done. I'm very touchy about domineering or righteous tops...
ReplyDeleteI'm happy to have joined up. Katherine Deane is the one who pushed me too. :-)
DeleteBetter late than never is right! I'm glad to see you joined the Table. :)
ReplyDeleteYou're absolutely right in that there is no better way from a dominant to strip the sub of her sense of control. There's no faster way for her to feel her most vulnerable and, in my very humble opinion, the sexual submission that can often follow is all the more erotic because of it.
I'm of mixed minds about non-con, because I do find allure in the "rape" fantasy. However, I won't read an actual rape scene, especially not one done for titillation...unless, it serves a purpose other than for erotica. It needs to have a major impact on the story, there needs to be a rebuilding of trust between hero and heroine, and it cannot be eroticised or okay that he ever did it. I have seen and, frankly, used non-consensual anal in other stories, and in both the woman came to desire if not enjoy it. Both those stories today still do extremely well, but I honestly don't think I'll ever write that kind of scene again. That line between fantasy non-con and stockholms syndrome is too thin, I think, for me to be comfortable walking.
I understand that some people like non-con. I just for me personally, it puts me in the wrong head space. Like I said, it just turns me off. I'm glad that you liked my post! :-)
Deleteso glad you jumped in, Meredith!
ReplyDelete:)
Fantastic post! I totally agree with you and feel the same way.
(I am working on editing my post right now. It will be way after the fact. Thanks for sharing!)
<3
I can't wait to read your post. Thank you for convincing me to do this! It was a really good way to get me to articulate my feelings on this subject...something that I've never done before. :-)
DeleteI think that this info will help you to write your resume summary. I had such experience recently
ReplyDelete